I’ve noticed something interesting while cruising the social media streets. Men are fed up with patriarchy but are too clueless to realize it.

They complain about burnout, depression, isolation, lack of purpose, fear of failure, impossible expectations, and emotional emptiness — but instead of blaming the system that created those conditions, they blame women.

They’ll talk for three hours on a podcast about how exhausted they are from being expected to provide, perform, dominate, suppress emotion, and carry the weight of the world without breaking… then somehow conclude that feminism is the problem. As if women invented the idea that men have to suffer in silence to prove masculinity.

Patriarchy taught men that vulnerability is weakness. Patriarchy taught them their value is tied to money, status, sexual conquest, and control. Patriarchy told them that tenderness is “soft,” therapy is shameful, caregiving is feminine, and emotional intimacy is unnecessary unless sex is attached to it. Then when those same rules leave them lonely, disconnected, and emotionally malnourished, women become the scapegoat.

A lot of men are grieving a version of manhood that was never sustainable to begin with. But instead of interrogating the system, they lash out at the people who stopped quietly tolerating it. Women speaking openly about sexism, emotional labor, abuse, double standards, and inequality didn’t create male loneliness. What changed is that women are no longer willing to disappear inside relationships just to cushion men from themselves.

And social media has put all of it on full display. Men are publicly unraveling under expectations they didn’t personally create but still aggressively defend. They are angry at the emotional isolation patriarchy created while mocking the very tools that could free them from it.

The tragedy is that many of them are standing inside a burning house screaming at women… instead of questioning who built the damn house in the first place.