The Potty Mouth Granny

  • The Life I Planned at Eight

    As I lay in bed contemplating my existence, a random thought floated into my mind: did I ever actually want to get married, or was that desire planted there by society? When I was a little girl, I had big plans for myself. I wanted to be a lawyer—specifically a prosecuting attorney—so I could lock…

    thepottymouthgranny

  • What is Feminism?

    Feminism is the radical, sometimes inconvenient idea that women are fully human—with minds of their own, bodies that belong to them, and lives that are not side quests in someone else’s story. Feminism is about autonomy. At its core, feminism says women deserve political, economic, social, and personal equality. Not favors. Not protection. Not pedestal…

    thepottymouthgranny

  • Sole Survivor

    Six years next month. Six quiet, thunderous years of carrying a title no one applies for. A sole survivor is the last remaining member of their immediate family—the final branch on a once-leafy tree. My mother gave birth to three children. I am the only one left. No siblings to call and say, “Do you…

    thepottymouthgranny

  • Respectability Politics and the Policing of Black Male Love

    It’s more acceptable for a Black man to have ten children with ten different women than for him to be gay—and that fact should stop us in our tracks. We live in a world where irresponsibility gets a pass if it performs masculinity the “right” way. A man can leave a trail of single mothers,…

    thepottymouthgranny

  • Survival Is My Resume

    I do a good job of not being depressed, but let’s be clear—it’s work. Daily, intentional, teeth-gritting work. I followed the script American society handed me, even when the pages were stained and missing chapters. I became a teenage mother and didn’t earn my GED until I was twenty-seven. I went to college while raising…

    thepottymouthgranny

  • This Is Planet Earth (Bop bop bop bop bop bop bop bop)

    I’m sitting here rewatching Planet Earth, one of the greatest documentaries ever produced. Before I watched it, I was on the verge of atheism—but then the planet itself started testifying. I knew then that it had to be something higher than just us mere mortals. Something vast and patient. Something that doesn’t need applause or…

    thepottymouthgranny

  • Adults

    Grown folks will stomp your spirit down to the bone if you let them. Adults come loaded with agendas, unhealed wounds, power plays, side-eyes, and opinions they swear are facts but don’t know their asses from a hole in the wall. Everybody wants something. Everybody’s dumb and proud of it. I’m tired of their dirty…

    thepottymouthgranny

  • When Blood Recognizes Itself

    Lately, I’ve been seeing the faces of my ancestors in strangers. A jawline in the grocery store line. A pair of eyes on the bus that feel like déjà vu with a pulse. A woman laughing two tables over, her mouth moving exactly like my mother’s used to when joy caught her off guard. It’s…

    thepottymouthgranny

  • Tears, Television, and an Animated Sponge

    When my eldest brother died nearly six years ago, a simple cartoon helped carry me through the first raw, disorienting days of grief. My brother didn’t have any life insurance, so it fell to me to lay him to rest—and I had no money. I managed to scrape together $1,000 toward a cremation, but I…

    thepottymouthgranny

  • Happy New Year

    It’s a new year, a new beginning. An opportunity to start over. A clean page, not because the old chapters were mistakes, but because they taught you how to hold the pen differently.  You don’t have to become a brand-new person overnight—growth isn’t a costume change. Sometimes it’s quieter than that. Sometimes it’s choosing yourself…

    thepottymouthgranny